Truth Tuesday

Shout out to my Mama Bear for reminding me to write a Truth Tuesday.

• I'm down to less than a week left in Austria which is surreal. One minute I'm ready to be on that plane, and the next I'm clinging on to all the things I will miss here. Mostly food. And friends...I guess. ;) 
• I hate that I still break out. I'm so over it. 
• I had chocolate for dinner tonight and I don't feel the least bit guilty. I'm only here for a few more days, so I'm going to be a complete glutton. 
• So, I've always loved music. Maybe too much sometimes. But I found that for a while I just wasn't listening that much, and that makes me sad. Well, in the last few days that has dramatically changed. Now I have to have my headphones in or music playing while I'm doing something in my room. I'm discovering artists I didn't know I had in my music library and rediscovering old favorites. Music is one of God's greatest gifts to man. But seriously.
• Today I went to the top of pretty much the tallest mountain in Innsbruck by cable car. And it was incredible. There was lots of snow and it was freezing cold and I got to look down on my city. The city that felt SO big when I first arrived. And there I was today, days away from leaving, looking down on teeny tiny Innsbruck while feeling on top of the world. I can do hard things, guys. :)
• It's incredibly weird for me to think that a week from today I'll be HOME at my family Christmas party. I'm pretty stoked that I get to see the greatest people in the entire world in just one week. One week!
• I hate how dry my hands get in the winter. I feel like a 90-year-old woman with dry shriveled hands. Blehhhh...

I shall bid you all farewell on my final Tuesday in this blessed country! Aufwiedersehen! 

A Dream

I’m approaching the last week of my time here in Austria.

It’s been almost like a dream. While you’re inside of a dream it feels as if it has gone on for ages; it feels like it won’t ever come to an end. Then you suddenly wake up and it is back to reality once more, the dream feeling like it was a mere two minutes in duration. Depending on the dream, that awakening into reality can be dreaded or welcomed.

Like a dream, my time seemed to last forever but now as it's coming to and end it seemed so fast. So what is this sudden “awakening” to me in accordance to my time in Austria? Is the end dreaded or welcomed? That’s a difficult question to answer. First let me explain the many things I’ve learned since being here.

I’ve learned that I have an incredible support system back home. I have the most amazing mother. That woman knows me better than anyone. She knows exactly what to say to comfort me, to make me laugh, and I would most definitely not be in Austria right now if it wasn’t for her. Not only has she supported me financially (Christmas is covered for the next 15 years, Mom) but also emotionally and spiritually. She’s simply fantastic. Second in line to that mother o’ mine, is Kameron. He has been way more supportive about this whole thing than I ever could have hoped for. I know it wasn’t easy for him to give me up for two and a half months, but he knew it was something I needed to do and that I wanted to do, so he supported me. We talk nearly every day, and I feel even closer to him from 5,500 miles away then I did when I was at home. Needless to say, I’m pretty excited to see him again.

I’ve learned about a new culture. I’ve learned random things, like to remember that I need to have 50 cent coins in case I have to use a public restroom when I’m out. Or that I should bring my own bag to go grocery shopping so I don’t have to buy one while I’m at the store. I’ve learned that Austrians don’t like PB&J sandwiches. I’ve learned that Europeans dress really well and I have come to love wearing scarves every single day. I’ve eaten delicious food and will shed a few tears knowing I won’t have delicious European chocolate every day anymore. Never again will I have the chance to LIVE in Austria. I may come back and visit, but I can never get this experience again. So, when deciding what to do with one of my last weekends here, I chose to go stay with my roommate’s family rather than travel to Italy—a place I’ve wanted to visit for ages. And I’m so grateful I did. I can come back to Italy. I can’t always get the experience I did staying at Sandra’s house, getting to know her parents and her sisters, and seeing a little of the Austrian countryside with some true Austrians. Before I came to Europe, I was under the impression that I would see all these new places and countries and I would be traveling every weekend to some new area of Europe. That was not the reality, however. And I’m okay with that. No, I’m more than okay with that. I did get the chance to see some great new places, but more importantly, I lived in Innsbruck. Innsbruck became my home. I can go back to the States and while I may not be able to say that I saw a lot of places, I will be able to say that I experienced something. To me, that is where the value lies.

I’ve learned to appreciate what I have back at home. Like English everywhere, for example. I’ve learned to appreciate having stores that are open 24 hours a day. I’ve learned to appreciate ranch dressing and a gourmet hamburger. I’ve learned to appreciate drinking fountains, free water at restaurants, and instructions written in English. I’ll remember how lucky I am to have instant communication with my friends and family instead of waiting until they’re awake and they check their email or get on Facebook. I have learned to appreciate stores where I can buy cheap shoes, even if they fall apart quickly. Most of all, I’ll appreciate the close location of a temple and of church buildings. I am so impressed by the members here and their willingness to come to church every Sunday even if they have to drive an hour both ways. I’ve got it good at home, and hopefully I’ll remember that.

I’ve learned to be independent and to learn things for myself. I don’t know if I was necessarily shy before coming to Austria, but I didn’t ask many questions. I let other people do things for me. Here, I have to come out of my shell and peek my head out of that lovely little thing we call a comfort zone. And that has been the one of the greatest things to experience.

I’ve learned what it’s like to be in the minority. Not only do I come from a different country and speak a different language, but I come from a different culture entirely—a culture even a little different within my own country. I don’t drink. I don’t smoke. I don’t drink coffee or tea. I’m getting married at the age of 20. To sum it up: I’m different. And I’ve never been “different” growing up in Utah. Everyone around me was like me or at least knew the ways of the culture. It’s hard to explain if you’ve never been in a minority, but it’s humbling. And strangely, it brings you closer to those aspects about yourself that make you unique. It has made me more tolerant for those people that are different from me, and I’ll be forever grateful for that.

I’ve learned that I can do hard things. In the first month I was abroad, my wonderful mother sent me a package. Inside was a framed cross-stitch I received several years ago at girls camp that displays the words “I Can Do Hard Things” with an orange and yellow sun below the words. As I opened this package I got a little teary-eyed. That month had been one of the hardest times of my life. And by the time I got this package, I was just starting to figure out that I could survive it. Not only could I survive it, but I could genuinely enjoy myself. I had never expected my trip to be as difficult as it was. This isn’t to say I was miserable, because that is far from the truth. I was having a good time and loving it, but it. was. hard. This little framed cross-stitch sits as one of the only things on my nightstand and I see it every morning when I wake up. Things aren’t near as difficult as they were those first few weeks, but every morning I’m reminded that tough times don’t last forever. I can do hard things. Which brings me to my last and most important lesson.

I learned how much the Lord loves me. I learned that He is an essential part of my everyday life. Before coming to Austria, I knew the church was true. I went to church every Sunday, I prayed, I read my scriptures, and I felt the spirit. However, there was always a part of me that felt like something was missing. Perhaps it wasn’t that something was missing, but that I was missing something. I saw people stand and bear witness of Christ with so much conviction that I felt I would never have. I didn’t doubt. I knew it was true, that Christ is my Savior and that He died for me. I knew that God lives and that he answers prayers. But why didn’t I have such conviction about it? Then I came to Innsbruck. My first day here I had no phone, no internet connection, no knowledge of the city, the language, the people. I had no friends here and no connections to home. So I used the one connection that I know I’ll never lose—prayer. I knelt next to my bed in my empty apartment and offered up the most sincere prayer of my entire life with tears streaming down my face. At that moment, God was the only person I could turn to. He was my only friend. And in the next weeks, as things settled down, he became my closest friend. Something drastically changed within me. My relationship with the Lord has never been stronger. He was right by my side though every little struggle or pain or longing for home and He gave me comfort when I needed it most. Now, as I write this, I once again have tears in my eyes. But these aren’t tears of fear, loneliness, sadness or longing. These are finally tears of conviction. I know God lives. And that knowledge is the souvenir I’ll cherish most.

So back to my original question: do I dread the end of my trip or is it welcomed? Easy. Both. As they say, “There’s no place like home.” I’m incredibly excited to be with the ones I love again. But I’ve learned more about myself here in two months that I’ve learned in the last 20 years. I’ve grown to absolutely love this country and the people in it and I’ll be sad to leave. All good things must come to an end, but luckily for me, this end means the start of a wonderful and beautiful beginning.

Until next time, Austria.  

It’s been a dream.

Truth Tuesday

I'm lacking sleep and I'm about to take a nap, so hopefully this post makes sense.

Truth Tuesday!

• I turned in my last paper and gave my last presentation of my semester today and it feels SOOO nice. (I have two more papers to finish, but I'll be a married woman by the time they have to be emailed to the professors.)
• I was super stressed and worried about my presentation running like half an hour too short, but I ended up having to cut it down a lot due to lack of time. That was a pleasant surprise. 
• I have completely changed my sleeping habits since being here. I usually go to bed before midnight and wake up around 8:00 every morning. Anyone that knows me well knows that waking up at 8:00 on my own is totally not normal for me. I think the latest I've slept in here is like 10:30. That's a normal wake up time at home when I have nowhere to be. I wonder if this will continue. 
• If I ever have to count things, I now count in German without thinking about it. 
• I've recently started watching Modern Family and I can't stop. I think the show is incredibly funny. It's not very often that a show can make me literally laugh out loud when I'm alone, but this show does. I would recommend it. 
• I'm going to take a nap right now. That's the truth. 

I hope everyone has a splendid Tuesday! :)

Nauseating Words

Just in case you're wondering: Yes, this is me avoiding the last page of my paper. Sue me.

Okay, I have several pet peeves in this world. For instance: when people use the word "legitly," extreme indecisiveness, loud chewing, and the incorrect use of the word "your." (That's just to name a few. I think I have an unhealthy amount of pet peeves.)

But there is one pet peeve that happens most often over social networking sites. It happens when two people fall in love. All of the sudden, every post or status update has to do with their significant other.


I'm not talking about an occasional, simple post where a mature adult is expressing their gratitude for their spouse, boyfriend, or girlfriend. That's a completely different thing.

What I'm talking about are the countless people that constantly post things such as: "OMG I'm so totes blessed with the greatest bf in the whole world and I'm so lucky and he's my everything and rainbows and butterflies!! omg."

Okay, so that might be a little exaggerated. But you get my point. You all know the posts I'm talking about. I'm all for people being in love. I myself have turned into a cheesy fool since meeting Kam and I'm fully aware of what love can do to a person. It makes you say nauseating things.

But keep it off of Facebook, please.

I say very seemingly nauseating things to Kameron all the time, but I try to only say them privately to him, or I'll say things to friends about him, but not to the rest of the world. When it happens more privately, things actually have meaning. The cheese becomes something cute and meaningful rather than embarrassing because it gets posted in everyone's news feeds and people want to throw up. 

In fact, Kam and I like to do the exact opposite of the aforementioned offense. A few examples:

• Kam's RSVP for our wedding on Facebook is currently "Maybe Attending"

• When I posted a picture of my engagement ring, I captioned it with: "It's okay, I guess."

• I wrote Kam a Facebook post telling him we needed to go to a comedy show on Jan. 28th, but felt like there was something else going on that day, but that it probably wasn't important. 

• We joke about how the only reason Kam got engaged was because he's paying me. (Slacking on the payments, Kam...)

• I always tell people the number one reason I'm marrying Kam is for money. Love is about seventh on the list.

So you see, we're not the lovey-dovey Facebook couple that seems to be taking over the world. And I'm so grateful for that. If anything it shows me I'm marrying the right dude. We have the same sense of humor and it's perfect.

I'm not going to make a countdown to my wedding on Facebook and I'm not going to gush over how excited I am that I get to marry my best friend, even though I've never been more excited for anything in my entire life.

I don't have to change my Facebook status to prove to anyone that I'm in love.

But I still reserve the right to blog about it.

Gratitude Challenge

My dear friend Alyssa posted this in her blog. It's from the First Presidency message "The Choice to be Grateful" and at the end they issue a Gratitude Challenge.

Challenge accepted.

1.Write 10 physical abilities you are grateful for: Walking, running, hugging, smiling, seeing, laughing, sleeping, eating/tasting, talking, aaaaand kissing. (Do you expect me to lie?)

2. Write 10 material possessions you are grateful for: laptop, phone, car, iPod, contacts/glasses, a good coat, my bed, books, a camera.

3. Write 10 living people you are grateful for: This one is hard because I have 10 siblings. I'll count them (and their spouses) as 5. Okay? Mom, Dad, Siblings (5), Kameron, Janice, Kirk.

4. Write 10 deceased people you are grateful for: Grandma Turley, Grandpa Felix, Grandma Felix, Joseph Smith, Gordon B. Hinckley, George Washington, Gutenberg, Martin Luther, Edgar Allen Poe (yes, really), Abraham Lincoln

5. Write 10 things about nature you are grateful for:  mountains, sunny days with light breezes, snow (sometimes), the smell after rain, thunderstorms, laying in the green grass, lakes, the colors of Fall, spring flowers blooming, FRUIT!

6. Write 10 things about today you are grateful for: Finishing my project, Christmas markets, listening to the BNL Christmas album, a warm bed, understanding some German, Austrian food, the internet, Skype, feeling happy about life, good friends.

7. Write 10 places on earth you are grateful for: Home, my second home in Bountiful, the temple, the church building here in Innsbruck, Schloss Ambras, anywhere in the mountains, Logan, Sammy's (craving a pie shake right now), hospitals, the Christmas markets. :)

8. Write 10 modern inventions you are grateful for: internet, computers, MP3 players, cell phones, automobiles, airplanes, ATMs, microwaves, A/C, heaters

9. Write 10 foods you are grateful for: Wienerschnitzel, GOOD hamburgers, hot chocolate, popcorn, Nutella, bacon, pasta, chocolate, raspberries, cucumbers.

10. Write 10 things about the gospel you are grateful for: The Atonement, repentance, eternal families, constant companionship of the Spirit, prayer and answers to prayers, temple work for the dead, the true happiness it brings me, modern revelation, hymns, the Plan of Salvation. (If you want to know more about these things and the LDS faith, click here to find out more! :) )

I love my life. I'm seriously so blessed!! Thanks to everyone that has made me the happy girl I am today. :)